Okay, so as bad as I was feeling the other day when I posted, I feel worse now.  Besides the things I'm not talking about here, the day before yesterday I had to take an hour off of work to go get a new tire put on my car, because the one on it was about to blow.  Okay, no problem, money's tight, but I can squeeze it in and still eat for the next two weeks until I get paid again, right?  Well, yesterday after I got off work, I'm going down the road and my car just fucking DIES!  It dies right while I'm driving down the road!  My own educated guess is that my fuel pump went out.  $140 to replace.  Like I've got that kind of money.  It will completely wipe me out to have to pay for that. 

Luckily for me, my boyfriend is letting me drive one of his trucks to work & back, but I've got to put gas in it, which I can't really afford, since I filled up my own car not six hours before it crapped out on me. 

What the fuck, seriously?  I feel like my life is some sort of cosmic joke.  That I was randomly picked out of the whole human population by god or the devil or someone and they said, "hey, lets see how much we can actually do to this pathetic being before she can't take any more.  Who wants to place bets on the day she finally breaks, eh?  Any takers?"

On top of all that, I own one pair of shoes (non-heel) and they're falling apart, but because of everything else going on in my life, I can't even afford to get another pair to wear. 

I feel myself spiraling down into a state of depression, and every time I think I can claw my way free, here comes that giant cosmic boot again to kick me in the head and knock me back down into the hole.

I hate my life.

Thank everyone for their kind words to my last post, it really meant a lot to me.  I choked up a little.  Honestly.  And Leggs, I remember ya :)